Stereotypes about elves

Courtesy of our good friend Noid (he's watching me type this right now), we present to you five of the most popular stereotypes about elves.

1. Elves are immortal.
   Not true. Technically and biologically, they can live, perhaps, an indefinite number of years, but over time, cognitive functions begin to degrade - like a hard drive from the beginning of the century that has not been defragmented for a long time. Therefore, when elves feel that dementia is creeping up, they usually leave this life voluntarily. No, this is not suicide - they simply lie down in bed and fall into eternal sleep. The longest-living person in history was just under ten thousand years old.
2. Alvs are vegetarians.
   Not true. Biologically, elves need even more animal protein than humans do - but overall it turns out that they eat less meat. For two reasons:
   — today, people consume more animal protein than they should;
   - Many elves strongly disapprove of human industrial animal husbandry, so they often engage in it themselves.
3. The elves are as beautiful as angels.
   Doubtful. It would be more accurate to say that they have a very specific appearance: they are very tall, often skinny and sinewy rather than muscular; add to all this huge slanted eyes and crazy protruding cheekbones. Some people like them, some don't.
4. The elves are wise, serious, rarely smile and grieve over the imperfections of the world.
   Also nonsense. Glinnar elves usually call such otherworldly individuals "divine" with slight disdain, because this is most often a feigned attempt to demonstrate their importance and wisdom in life. Normal people usually don't have time for this - within 24 hours they need to finish packing a wardrobe, write a poem, take a couple of Old English lessons, start studying category theory and go for a bike ride with friends.
5. Elves rarely say what they think.
   And this is absolutely true. Long years of life teach you to be careful in choosing your words and friends, and make you acquire the annoying habit of giving ambiguous answers even to an offer to drink coffee. If you do not understand what the elf has answered you, tell him so directly: if he sees that you are interested with good intentions, he will certainly open up a little more.